Little Kelsie foo

Just so everyone knows, one week from tomorrow is when Kelsie meets with the mediator in court who will decide her fate. I talked to Brett today and he really touched my heart with how emotional he was about the situation. Apparently the night before Kelsie called Kenny from school to come get her, Brett and Julie had been at the temple and Brett had been impressed to put Kenny, Laticia, and Kelsie's names on the prayer roll. Coincidence? Brett and I decided that (since we all live relatively close to a temple) we should as a family (and whoever else that's reading this that would like to) attend the temple on Tuesday night, the night before the mediation. Brett said something while we were talking that stuck with me about mom being involved in this situation (we all know how she felt about Kelsie)... and about an hour after I got off of the phone with him I realized that the anniversary of mom's death (which I have been painfully aware of) is also one week from tomorrow, on the day of the mediation. Just struck me as interesting. Everyone, let's pray so hard so we can get little Kelsie girl for good. Just one little snippet from my conversation with her on Friday night....
Me: Kelsie, do you realize that if your dad gets custody you get to go to girls camp this summer?!?
Kelsie: Nicole.... do you realize that if my dad gets custody, I can get baptized??
My heart aches for this sweet little girl, everyone pray hard!

Sadness in my Heart

I made a discovery today. I am still 100% traumatized and affected by my mother's death. There is such a hole in my heart and in my life that can't be filled without her here. For so long I have pushed back my sadness, tried to suck it up, and be strong about it... and I am so tired. I have been anything but strong as I have weeped my way through the day. I miss her so much. So so much. How do you replace someone like her? It's impossible. You can't. Even though I know she is so happy and out of this imperfect world, I'm selfish and I want her here to love me and tell me how perfect I am. Anyone want to fill that position? haha

Navy Bean!!!

I am posting to introduce you to Navy Esther Osborne, born January 12, 2007 at 4:07 pm, weighing in at 6 pounds 1 oz. (so tiny!!) These pics were taken about an hour and a half after she was born. She is beautiful, perfect, tiny, and very cozy. I got all choked up when I walked into the room and saw little kirsti with a little baby. She is so happy and glowing and is already such a good momma. I love her and i love little navy bean.


Oh by the way Kell, you can kinda see how my hair is, even though these are bad pics of it.

Update

Lots of different things and decisions etc. going on right now. First of all I am officially on the south beach diet. I have just completed day two and am doind pretty good. I am surprising myself with my will power, and I can't wait to be skinny! Second of all, I am excited because Tyler and i will have been married for one yearin exactly one week. So next weekend we are going to Jackson Hole for one night, fun fun. Third of all, we put an offer on a house! I'll tell more about it tomorrow, because I'm so tired, and we have to fill out an app. on line for the bank. Ok, bye.